WARNING: WHAT FOLLOWS IS PURE VENTING!
How foul a mood am I in today? Let me count the ways.
1. For the last week, my in box has been filling up with various Mother’s Day offers. Discounts on flowers, electronics, etc.
My mother died a couple of months ago. I don’t need to be reminded of this by the giant capitalism machine.
2. My attempts to rebrand my Twitter feed as a funny feed has been limited because…frankly, the writers block has been kicking my ass. Something borne out by my mostly bare aforementioned feed. To make matters worse, the one thing guaranteed to make my writer’s block worse has happened.
3. Ashland has done it’s traditional leap frog from winter to summer. The high here today is a balmy 88 degrees. Those in drought stricken area are more than welcome to tell me go fuck myself at this point. (Seriously, I understand.) But the fact is that I do not function well in hot weather. My brain, which hasn’t exactly been firing on all cylinders to begin with, gets even more fuzzier. I have have two fans on in my apartment now. One at the window and the one over my stove in my kitchen area. Neither of which seems to be making a dent in the heat. And this heat also up my awareness of…
4. The Carbon count in earth’s atmosphere hit 400 ppm this week!
For many years scientists have said that concentrations need to be kept below, or pushed back to, 350 ppm for countries to meet an international target of keeping the average temperature increase below 3.6 degrees Fahrenheit (2 degrees Celsius) this century.
Which means the climate is going to become more extreme. The hot places will get even hotter. Food will become harder to grow. Drinking water will become scarce. Basically, Mad Max without the fun bits.
5. I’m out of St. John’s Wort.
6. I am acutely aware that I need a blow job.
That’s pretty much my life in a nutshell right now. My biggest regret is that I don’t have a decent punchline.