1. “I am at peace with my wife and my wife is at peace with me”. This is a sentence that can be interpreted in a number of ways. Such as…
“My wife is fine with me tomcatting around. Time I spend putting the wood to other women is time she can catch up on her reading. Hell, she’s working through the novels of Don DeLillo for the third time and she says they just keep getting funnier and funnier.”
“We’ve grown so used to the pain we inflict on each other that we prefer marinating together in our hate and acrimony than risk dying alone.”
Or the simplest translation…
“If I agree to stop running for President, she’ll agree not to take a cheese grater to my scrotum”.
There’s a kind of bravery in number two but I’m guessing number three is closer to the truth.
2. As Dr. Juan Cole points out over at his blog in forensic detail, Herman Cain shouldn’t have even been a contender. I seem to remember a time when you could have two men run each other for President and while you may have a preference, you at least felt that both men had the proper core competencies. (To the best of my memory, it was Clinton/Dole 96.) Now, every Presidential campaign turns into a Goddamn existential crises. Even if you don’t like the Democrat running, you still feel that you have to vote for him because the GOP is running someone who’s sole reason for believing he has all the answers is because he has no clue what the real questions are.
It is one thing to be ignorant of certain issues. It is another to take perverse pride in that ignorance. If a blogger can take the time to learn about an issue to write four paragraphs about it, you can put in the same fucking effort.
3. And finally, a piece of advice for Mr. Cain. If you are going to quote from Japanese Anime. For fuck’s sake, DONT MAKE IT POKEMON!! For one thing, given your current circumstances, you might want to stay away from anything with the word “Poke”. For another, you’re a grandfather. If you’re going to quote anime, make it something with credibility to an adult demographic like say “Paprika” or “Ghost in the Shell”. At least with “GITS”, you might gain some traction in the Transhuman demographic.
So farewell, Herman Cain. At least take comfort that you don’t have to share a footnote with Alan Keyes.