CARRIE PREJEAN: GOD’S LONELY MASTURBATOR.

-First off.  Really, Larry King?  Mr. Softball himself is being inappropriate?  The man has the attack instincts of a tribble.  Whatever you do. don’t get in the same room with Katie Couric.  Post-Palin, she still has the taste of blood in her mouth and she will gut you like a Tauntaun!

-Also, if you’re going to leave an interview, for fuck’s sakes. leave!  Don’t take off the mike and then sit there like a sophomore waiting for her mom to pick her up from chess club. If you’re going to behave like a diva, own it!  Storm out!  Push a P.A. against the wall!  Hell, Tom Tancredo made a stronger exit than you and he doesn’t have your bone structure. (By the way, tip o’the hat to whoever was directing the show that night.  The shot of Perjean sitting alone in her part of the studio was an excellent use of negative space.)

I think there are two things that need to be taken away from this.  1) Never set yourself up as being morally superior.  You will be revealed as a poser.  Did not the spectacle of Jimmy Swaggart teach us nothing?
2) If you are a young attractive woman seeking a career in the arts and media, DO NOT get yourself naked and dirty in front of a camera.  Unless you are actively looking looking for a career in porn, it will not end well.
And on the other side of that, guys.  If you have a lady friend who is nice enough to get dressed up in a Princess Leia slave girl bikini and pretend that a glow in the dark vibrator is a “Lightdildo” and uses it to get jiggy with the dark side of the force on camera for you.  The least you can do is keep that shit private.  Seriously, is a few extra dollars in your pocket worth being labeled a douchebag for the rest of your life?
Enough with the celebrity amateur sex tapes.  Let’s leave porn to the professionals, shall we?

EDIT: After receiving a tweet from Alan Cerny (@nordlingAICN.) I am compelled to clarify.  The above scenario was not meant to be a description of Ms. Prejean’s tape tape but an example of what kind of tape might be floating around out there of other celebrities.  My apologies to my fellow sad geek boys. 

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About theragingcelt

Actor/Writer/Homegrown Pundit/Cranky Progressive/Sometimes Filmmaker. talesofthegeeknation.com
This entry was posted in douchebag boyfriends, media whoring, Right wing Idiots. Bookmark the permalink.

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