SUMMER MOVIE BLAST: "G.I. JOE: THE RISE OF COBRA"

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You know, I look at this trailer. And immediately my inner thirteen year old starts rubbing my inner Middle Aged Film Snob the wrong way.
The Thirteen year old: “Oh wow, those ships look cool! Oh wow, they made the Eiffel Tower dissolve! Oh, wow they got ninjas! Gee, that redheaded girl has nice boobies!”
The M.A.F.S.: “What they made a movie out of the G.I. Joe toy line? Thanks “Transformers”. Yep, more Stephen Sommers style CGI mayhem. Really, Jonathan Pryce as the President? Oh, well. At least Dennis Quaid is getting a decent paycheck this time around. Oh, wow! Rachel Nichols has some sweet boobies!”.
Yes, never underestimate the power of boobies to unite the generations.
The last time I sat through a Stephen Sommers film was “Van Helsing” which was so over stuffed with action set pieces, it looked more like an ILM demo reel than an actual film. And somehow, this looks like more of the same. Granted the script was co-written by Stuart Beattie who did Michael Mann’s “Collateral”, so that means there might be some meat hidden in the cotten candy. But mostly, this looks like a case of commerce trumping art.
But at least Rachel Nichols has some…never mind.

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About theragingcelt

Actor/Writer/Homegrown Pundit/Cranky Progressive/Sometimes Filmmaker. talesofthegeeknation.com
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