On the one side, we have this…
You may disagree with the man on some things. (I personally winced when he started praising the Simpsons-Bowles “Cat food Commission”.) But on the whole, it was a solid performance. Robust, good-humored. One would be temped to call it Falstaffian except the vegan diet he’s on has really defatified his ass. (Wait, is defatified a word? Screw it, it is now.)
But mostly, it was awesome because Bill Clinton demonstrated the lost art of how you make a Goddamn political argument!
This is what we want to do. This is how we’re going to do it. This is what the other guys are doing. This is why it’s not working.
Forget political rhetoric. This was like watching a village elder showing his fellow tribesman how to make fire!
The difference between him and the GOP could be summed up in this snippet from Monty Python’s classic “Argument Clinic” sketch.
M: An argument isn’t just contradiction.
A: It can be.
M: No it can’t. An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a proposition.
A: No it isn’t.
M: Yes it is! It’s not just contradiction.
A: Look, if I argue with you, I must take up a contrary position.
M: Yes, but that’s not just saying ‘No it isn’t.’
A: Yes it is!
M: No it isn’t!
A: Yes it is!
M: Argument is an intellectual process. Contradiction is just the automatic gainsaying of any statement the other person makes.
(short pause)
A: No it isn’t.
On the other hand, we have this…
This is exactly how you do not make a political argument. Overly emotional. No specifics. Vague undercurrent of terror.
And seriously, a thousand years of darkness? Even in my side’s most hyperbolic moments, we never said that about Bush. And he destabilized the Middle East.
And again with the socialism thing? You know who doesn’t believe Obama’s a Socialist? Actual Socialists!
It’s now official. I live in a world where a puffy, white haired former President is more baddass than Clint Eastwood and Chuck Norris.
And you know what?
I’m fine with that.
